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Recalling college romances 

    page views:1  Publication date:2023-03-23  
"The Legend of Fairy Mingxue" is one of my favorite books. Although it's adult literature, the descriptions in that area are rather understated, and even a couple of passages feel somewhat forced. However, many scenes, especially those involving Zhao Qingqing and Zhu Lin, leave much to the reader's imagination and could easily be expanded upon.

Actually, my first impression of the book wasn't the book itself, but the female protagonist's name: Zhao Qingqing.

My college crush also had that name, and was equally beautiful, equally tall, equally intelligent, and equally capable.

What's most similar is Zhao Qingqing's flirtatious behavior towards men, which is exactly the same as my crush's attitude towards me.

I was a freshman at the time, and as one of the best among the freshmen, I was chosen by the student union to speak at the new semester's opening ceremony. My senior, who was the publicity committee member, helped me with my speech.

At that time, I didn't know what was so charming about me, but my senior, who usually had many admirers, suddenly became closer and closer to me after that. She often invited me to go out for late-night snacks at street food stalls after evening self-study, which made me a sworn enemy in the eyes of many upperclassmen.

Of course, I enjoyed it immensely. And, without realizing it, my initial infatuation with my senior's beauty gradually turned into infatuation with everything about her, especially that older sister-like feeling.

She was 1.7 meters tall, and I was 1.75 meters. Even in flat shoes, she always seemed taller than me when we walked together, and she loved to use that to her advantage, patting my head like a younger brother.

But I liked that feeling.

Two months later, the weather gradually turned cold. One weekend, my senior, who lived locally, asked me to help her move. "

Moving" was a euphemism; it was really just about buying a table at a secondhand market. Her parents worked for the railway and were rarely home, especially after she started university, so she often had to do these kinds of tasks.

The secondhand market wasn't far from her house, but halfway there, a torrential downpour started. We had to carry the folding table on our heads for the last few hundred meters, arriving at her house completely soaked.

She found some of her father's clothes for me to change into, and then we each took a hot shower. We washed our wet clothes in the washing machine, but the rain kept pouring, and the clothes wouldn't dry anytime soon. Her father was obviously very tall, and his clothes looked like an adult's clothes on me, like a child wearing a child's clothes.

I was thinking of just making do and going back home, but she disagreed, saying, "What will people say if you go back like this? So many people know you came to help me move today. If you go back like this, there will be gossip. You may not care, but I

can't stand it." So, I had no choice but to stay.

I spent the whole weekend at her house, and my clothes didn't dry until the afternoon of the next day. I returned to school before the school gates locked that night.

After that, almost every week, she would invite me to her house. Sometimes I would stay overnight, although I slept in the living room. But this close proximity made me think that our relationship had deepened.

So, when I saw her again after winter break, I confessed my love to her.

But she flatly rejected me.

Although she rejected me, she didn't ignore me. She continued to ask me out for meals, invited me to her house every week, and even took me on spring outings several times after spring arrived.

I once asked her if she was using me as a shield to stop other suitors.

She laughed and flicked my head, telling me bluntly that she was graduating next year and didn't know what would happen, while I had several more years to go. She said that if we got together, it would be sad if we couldn't be together later. It was better to be friends now; if we maintained this relationship for several years, both of us working, then we could decide whether to be together.

I thought she made sense, and from that day on, our occasional hand-holding became her linking arms with me when we went shopping.

So I was content.

During summer vacation, I didn't go home but traveled with her. We went to many places over a month, but our relationship remained stable, without any further development.

Many times, I tried to kiss her, and although she didn't dodge, she would always pull her face down and tell me that if I dared to kiss her without her permission, we would immediately break up.

Several times I considered taking the plunge and trying it, but I was afraid to accept the possibility of a real breakup.

Some might think she was just putting on an act, but she's the strong-willed type; what she says goes. We'd been dating for a year, and I knew that if I really did that, she would definitely break up, even if she didn't want to.

Later, one time we were drinking at an open-air bar on a pedestrian street in an unfamiliar city, and I begged her to let me kiss her, saying I was getting increasingly anxious.

Perhaps she softened, or maybe she'd had too much to drink, because she actually came over and kissed me on the cheek, then said I could kiss her cheek too.

I kissed her.

She seemed very nervous, and only after I kissed her did she tell me that this was the first time a boy had kissed her, and she was afraid I would break the rules because she didn't want to break up with me.

I asked her, "Isn't it better if we don't break up?"

She said that humans are always greedy and will take advantage of others. If she gave me what I wanted today, I would soon have new ideas, and then she would gradually give in and satisfy me. If we couldn't be together in the end, her future husband would suffer!

I still clearly remember how much pain she felt when she mentioned her future husband.

I wanted to promise her, but she immediately shut me up, telling me not to make any rash vows.

But soon, under her guidance, our relationship progressed further.

It was after we returned to the city where my school was located after our trip, but school hadn't started yet, so I had to stay at her house temporarily.

One day, I came back from the city library, and she was watching TV. Since she had brought me dinner on my way back, we ate and watched TV together.

But for some reason, even though the TV series was quite ordinary, she kept wanting to lean against me while watching. This was unimaginable before, because she had almost never let me hug her from behind and lie across my lap while watching TV.

Of course, I was very happy, although she stopped me several times when I tried to touch her body other than her waist.

It was quite late after watching TV. We washed up and went to bed, and I slept in the living room.

But just as I lay down, still reading a book, she suddenly appeared, stood in front of me, blushing, and said she wanted me to see if she was really pretty. I

said, "Of course! If you're not pretty, then no girl is pretty."

But she shook her head, gritting her teeth, looking very conflicted. After a while, I felt confused, so I sat up, intending to ask her what was wrong.

She suddenly told me that I could only look, not touch her.

I nodded in agreement; I was too scared to touch her anyway.

Then… she took off her pajamas right in front of me!

I swear, although I'd seen many pictures of naked women, this was the first time I'd ever seen a woman naked in person.

I kept fantasizing about what her body looked like. Although I'd seen her in a swimsuit during a recent trip, how could this compare?

I've always known she has long legs, ever since I saw her in a swimsuit; she always turned heads.

Her waist is also very slim, and her skin is fair… I know all that.

But what I wanted to know most was her breasts, yet I never had a chance to see even a glimpse of them, even in a swimsuit, I could only see the cleavage.

Now I know.

My senior's breasts aren't large, but they're round and firm, and the two nipples on top are truly as crimson as described in novels. I've seen many nude photos, and frankly, many big-name female celebrities have black nipples, or at least brown ones. So, although I've thought about many things, I never imagined my senior's were actually red, a deep crimson like cherries.

Thinking back to that time, I still feel so sad.

Because my first thought was that this woman might not be mine, so I cried, and the more I cried, the harder I cried, the tears wouldn't stop.

My senior didn't expect me to react like this, and she was so frightened that she rushed over to comfort me without even putting on her clothes, but the more she comforted me, the more heartbroken I became.

My senior asked me why?

I said, "Senior sister, you're so beautiful, but I'm so scared. I won't be able to spend the rest of my life with such a beautiful senior sister, so I feel so sad.

" Senior sister didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so she hugged my head, gently pressing it between her breasts, and said to me, "Even if we're not together in the future, I'll still give you a beautiful memory... Be gentle, okay?"

That night, I kissed senior sister's entire body, especially her breasts. Her nipples were sucked until they were more than twice their normal size. And it was the first time senior sister had ever seen a man ejaculate so closely. Although I ejaculated all over her head and face, she wasn't angry at all. She even used her fingers to pick out bits and pieces and eat them.

But that was it.

After that night, we were still virgins!

The next day, senior sister was very embarrassed. I asked her what happened yesterday.

Senior sister didn't hide anything and said that she accidentally saw a pornographic book online, so... But this kind of life soon ended, and the new semester began.

She wanted to take the postgraduate entrance exam, so she studied harder and harder. I didn't want to bother her, so I could only talk to her occasionally. We probably went out shopping and eating together only once or twice a month, and I never visited her home again because her mother was transferred to a support role.

Winter turned to spring, and she was so busy that it was hard for her to contact me, only sending a text message every day.

When I occasionally saw her, she was either in the library or on her way to and from school. Until graduation, there was only one time when she saw me from afar, ran towards me, and pulled me to a place where no one could see us—that was our last passionate kiss.

I didn't forget her, and neither did she.

She successfully entered graduate school, and I also did well in my studies, but I didn't see her for the entire junior year.

In my senior year, I heard that she had returned; someone had seen her on campus. I asked her, and she said that her father had been injured recently and had returned home to recuperate, so she rushed back to see him. She had originally come to see me, but seeing me chatting happily with many girls, she got angry and left.

She told me that although she was angry when she left, she now regretted it.

I cried again, pathetically, and apologized, promising never to talk to girls again… She laughed in exasperation!

But we still never saw each other again.

Then I graduated, didn't pursue postgraduate studies, and instead got a job at a state-owned research company, working six and a half days a week, day and night. Although I thought of her constantly and even visited the city where she studied,

we never had any chance to meet again after we separated. Every time we planned to meet, either she had an accident or I had an accident.

Until National Day, a year after I started working, we arranged to meet again, but my train ticket was stolen.

When I told her, she cried and told me we were truly not meant to be… She told me not to contact her anymore, that maybe we'd meet again? If that happened, then we'd never separate, even if it meant death. But if we never saw each other again, then so be it!

But so many years have passed. I'm married with children, and we've never seen each other again.

We haven't contacted each other either!

I wonder how she's doing!!!

[The End]

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