My girlfriend has an extremely high sex drive.

page views:1 Publication date:2022-05-08

My girlfriend has had 16 men before, including three Black men. When we first got together, she was seeing a doctor from out of town who was doing further training at her hospital. That doctor was already married with children, and he only contacted her because he was lonely and bored at the hospital. Basically, she would be with me when I was there, and when I wasn't, she would be with that doctor. They only broke up after he finished his training and went home. Only then did she fall in love with me, and now she's very good to me. I'm very conflicted.
I noticed from the beginning that this guy was constantly texting her, so I asked her who he was. She said he was her colleague, and he was relentlessly pursuing her. I earnestly told her, "You already have a boyfriend, don't flirt with other people." She readily agreed, saying that the guy knew about me, didn't mind, and even supported my friend being with me. When I wasn't there, I would call her, and she would often lie down next to that doctor while talking to me.
We met two months ago, and then it was Chinese New Year. She wanted me to come to her house to meet her parents. I went, even though it was snowing heavily. She came to my house too, but I only found out later that she was always with that doctor.
We've been together for almost a year now. I accidentally discovered she had three photos of Black men, and there were many other suspicious things. I used both gentle persuasion and coercion before she finally told me everything. I was devastated.
She cried and promised me that she used to be lonely and bored because she had no one around and wanted a man to keep her company through the long nights, which is why she was so unprincipled. But now that she has me, she won't be like that anymore. She has a strong sex drive and can't live without sex. She went out to eat KFC and saw a Black man, went over to chat with him, and then he took her home and slept
with her. The Black man was an international student. The second time she went to see him, he went out to buy something, and she lay on her bed to sleep. Then another Black man from the opposite dormitory came in and had sex with her too. It's been half a year since I found out about these things. She has indeed been very good to me and hasn't contacted any other men since. But one time she pressured me to get married. I said I'd wait a while, but she said she was getting old, she was 26 now and couldn't wait any longer. She got quite angry and wanted to break up with me, so I agreed. The day after the breakup, she asked her colleague to introduce her to a guy, and they met. Then they talked on the phone and texted every day. After a little over a week, she came back to me, saying she couldn't forget me. Now I really don't know if she'll ever betray me again, or stop messing around.
Since telling me everything, she's been incredibly good to me, crying every day and telling me she knows she was wrong and will never do it again. I think she really will change for the better, but now I'm very hesitant. She told me she can't live without a man, but with me, everything is fine. She said that after we get married, she won't betray me, not because of me, not for herself, but for the sake of our family. She's always wanted a warm and loving home. So she won't destroy our family. She's indifferent to sex, and she still thinks that way.
I really don't understand her. We've broken up and gotten back together countless times. Each time, she's adamant about breaking up, and each time she comes to my house and throws a huge tantrum at my parents, saying incredibly hurtful things, how terrible I am, and that she'd never be with me again, only to call me the next day and make up. This has happened at least ten times.
Now, here's the important part: she's pressuring me to marry her on the condition that I buy a house in the city. Her family lives in the countryside and has a younger brother; their circumstances aren't good. I have to pay for the house purchase, renovations, and appliances all by myself; her family won't contribute a single penny. Before we get our marriage certificate, she wants me to have a notarized statement that half the house belongs to her, and then she has to give me 3,000 yuan a month for living expenses. Houses here cost 8,000 yuan per square meter, so an 80-square-meter house would cost 640,000 yuan, plus another 200,000 yuan for renovations, totaling 800,000 to 900,000 yuan. I'm extremely disgusted by this.
I paid for the house and renovations entirely on my own, and she didn't contribute a single penny, yet she wants me to notarize a contract for half of it. She says she's afraid I'll divorce her within seven years of marriage, leaving her homeless. She's a nurse at a large hospital, earning nearly 4000 yuan a month, and she still wants 3000 yuan a month for living expenses. All this is because I feel her demands are excessive. It wasn't easy for me to settle down in Wuhan; it's all my parents' hard-earned money. But she thinks it's a man's duty to buy a house, and women shouldn't do anything. She's very firm, stating these two conditions are her bottom line, with no room for compromise. If you agree, we'll get married; if not, forget it.
My best friend told me:
marrying her is risky. The notarized house contract is fake; she really wants the property. She doesn't want to be left without leverage. With property in hand, you'll have to consider marriage or divorce. She's slept with 16 men; what's a few more?
Besides, those dozens of green hats you've worn didn't come for nothing; they came at a price. Some women are only meant for sex, not marriage.
You should have your own judgment. You should know whether she wants a house or marriage, lest you end up losing both. No matter
how great a man is, he can't be so great as to let a woman cheat on him multiple times. You think her body doesn't matter now, but that just means you haven't truly experienced marriage. Everyone lies; can you be sure which of her words are true and which are false?
If a man can't completely trust her, he shouldn't give a problematic relationship its rich rewards.
Furthermore, in your twenties, you can be a "bad woman" who manages men, not a "good object" for multiple men's beds.

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My girlfriend has an extremely high sex drive.

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