We asked some people with experience; let's see what they have to say about partner swapping:

page views:1 Publication date:2022-06-05

@Anonymous Age Confidential Work Location Beijing
At the beginning, I proposed this. It was a plan to swap partners with a friend I knew. My wife disagreed, thinking it was strange. After trying it a few times, she seemed to gradually like this swapping model; she was accepting and open to it, which I thought was great. But then one time, we had a conflict because of this. Here's what happened: One night, during her climax, she called out my friend's name several times. I was furious and very uncomfortable, not knowing if she did it on purpose or not. I slept with her, and she called out another man's name in bed—it was ridiculous! Was she trying to say my skills weren't as good as his? So I asked her directly, and she said she just said it casually and didn't notice. After this, I felt humiliated and challenged, so I suggested swapping partners. But she refused, saying she was used to it and there was no need to keep swapping. Because we couldn't reach an agreement on this, we got divorced. After the divorce, she actually got together with my friend! Haha, turns out she fell in love.
@monument 27 years old, working in Shanghai (this information is confidential)
, regarding the issue of "sex partner swapping," my girlfriend and I were very tacit and accepting of each other. Later, we joined a small group, similar to a club, specifically for sex partner swapping. Some were boyfriends/girlfriends, some were married. There were people from all walks of life, like lawyers, accountants, and doctors. Generally speaking, most of them were quite well-off. When my girlfriend and I first joined, it felt like opening up a whole new world. Later, I don't know exactly how many people we swapped with, but it was a lot, and we went very frequently. I thought I could continue like this forever, but reality was cruel: doing it too much led to problems, and I ended up getting several diseases. After she went for a checkup, she found out she had also contracted it. Now I dare not do it anymore. Hehe, I'm sharing this to warn those who might consider doing this.
@Anonymous 33 years old, private company manager, Hangzhou:
Actually, I also entered the world of "sex partner swapping" somewhat unknowingly. It's just that after doing it for a long time, I became addicted, making it difficult to maintain a normal marital relationship. Since we started swapping partners, my wife and I have barely slept together a few times a year, and we seem to be losing interest in each other. It's not just in our sex life; even seeing her in daily life makes me feel annoyed, like I'm growing to hate her more and more. I've tried to convince myself that it's just a partnership, and I can just put up with it. But then I fell in love with one of my partners. I want to divorce my husband and be with her; I hope she'll divorce her husband too. But she doesn't seem to take it seriously. She says that while it's fun, feelings and sex should be separate. I didn't expect a woman to be so clear about this. But I'm hopelessly in love with her, and I can't easily separate the two. That's the painful part. Even if I don't have the chance to marry her, I don't want to be with my wife anymore; this feeling is very strong. I haven't figured out what to do yet. My child is a major concern for me. I'll make a decision after I've thought it through.
@Anonymous, 35-year-old self-employed, Zhejiang.
Speaking of this, I really don't know how to begin. I'm addicted to "sex partner swapping," and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Actually, at first, my wife couldn't accept or understand it, but after my constant persuasion, she agreed to give it a try. She quickly grew to like it and had a lot of fun. Everything was fine before that, and we never argued about it. Until one time, while we were in bed, she actually praised another man's technique in front of me, talking for a long time. The way she looked at me was like she was mocking me. I couldn't hold back and slapped her a few times. She wasn't one to back down either; seeing me hit her, she fought back with all her might. We probably went too far, there were screams and shouts, and the neighbors thought something had happened and called the police. When the police arrived, she pretended to be the victim, saying I had just hit her, without mentioning that she had also hit me. Perhaps seeing that I was also injured, the police mediated and left. That night, she went to her best friend's house, saying that we were just having fun together, but hitting someone was her bottom line. Anyway, she said I crossed her line, and she wanted a divorce. I disagreed, and she said we should separate, since she wouldn't come back to the house anyway. So I'll just wait and see who's tougher. What am I afraid of?
"Finally, some personal thoughts"
: Many things about "sexual desire"—once you take the first step, there will be countless more. Some people say it's just "trying it out." Because they think trying it out is harmless. But with "sex partner swapping," once you swap partners, you'll want to try another different body. Everyone and every body is different. If you get addicted, you'll try every possible way to swap partners, forever chasing novelty, but novelty is never-ending. So, before you start, you need to seriously consider the potential consequences and costs, instead of just pursuing the immediate, illusory enjoyment. The beauty of sex never comes from swapping or moving between different bodies. Its beauty lies in the fact that you can enjoy different but wonderful real physical pleasure with the same person each time.

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