Between words and deeds

page views:1 Publication date:2013-03-10

Most couples like to use vulgar language during sex, and I'm no exception!
As we spend more time together, our sexual positions, language, and thoughts become increasingly daring. I often fantasize about servicing my wife with another man. The scenes in those fantasies are always so alluring, as if they're right before my eyes: imagining my wife holding a stranger's penis and stroking it, while I thrust into her deep pool... two valiant men using every position to possess her, finally our semen flooding into her mouth, her greedily sucking our glans...! That excitement and stimulation always overwhelms me! My wife
is quite traditional, so I can only cautiously try to express my thoughts. At first, she was very unhappy, calling me crazy... but I still can't help but ramble on during sex. Over time, she gradually became less averse, but she has never truly agreed! And so... I continue, and she gets used to it, just talking about it, never actually doing anything! I'm out of town, and sometimes online I've told her, "If I really want to, let's find a man to have some fun with." When I said that, it was completely from the bottom of my heart. I just thought: both men and women need physical pleasure, and as long as it doesn't involve emotions or real commitment, having some fun is perfectly acceptable—just treating another man as a sex object for romantic enjoyment!
These thoughts, which I usually didn't care about, changed after this year's Spring Festival!
During the Spring Festival, when families reunite, I traveled a long distance home to enjoy some time alone with my wife!
The day after I got home, my wife went out, and I was idly playing on QQ. I accidentally found some chat pictures of my wife and someone else in my QQ folder! The moment I saw the pictures, I didn't know how to feel; only intense curiosity made me quickly open them… The pictures weren't as offensive as I imagined, but the language was rather ambiguous, calling each other "husband" and "wife"! I tried to find more pictures in the folder (I don't know what my purpose or psychology was), but the few I found didn't reveal any information… I just imagined the worst-case scenario: had my wife already slept with someone else?
A long afternoon passed. When it got dark, my wife came home. I pretended to be calm, as if nothing had happened until we made love that night. During a vulgar conversation, I hinted to her that I knew... Later, she said she had indeed met him and that she really wanted to have sex. A strange anger rose within me, but thinking of the children, this family, and all the years we'd spent together, I didn't want to lose it all! I tried to calm myself down and suppress my feelings, but I couldn't stop wanting to know the details, even demanding she describe the sex... I tried to be open, even if it meant I'd encouraged her to find other men and it had worked out.
Under my relentless questioning and curiosity, she finally admitted to having sex with him and briefly described the details! At that moment, I felt a sense of relief, but those details kept replaying in my mind, tormenting me... Until late at night, I asked my wife again, and she suddenly cried, saying, "We didn't even have sex, we didn't even see each other's private parts!" I asked why, and she told me everything!
She said she had indeed chatted with that man online for a while, and that she went there that day to see if it was as exciting as I described (because I often told her: "I've always been the one doing your thing, it would be really exciting to see another man's penis and try something new"). After arriving at his place, they chatted for a while, exchanged pleasantries, and then she went into the man's room! It was lunchtime, and the man's workplace was bustling with people. His accommodation was just a temporary prefab house next to the office on the second floor. After going in and doing it for a while, the wife got up, turned her back to the man, and gestured for him to undress! But the man suddenly said: "This isn't good, I can't betray your husband, we've known each other since childhood!!" The wife was stunned, turned around and left the room, saying she felt ashamed, that she had offered herself up, but he didn't appreciate it, and she had to stop abruptly... For a moment, she even felt that the man was superior.
I was skeptical; it sounded more convoluted and bizarre than a novel! After countless doubts, the wife finally temporarily dispelled my suspicions with a solemn oath. (We locals generally don't have our relatives make solemn oaths; our views are quite traditional.)
And so, the Spring Festival passed in constant suspicion. Soon it was time to go back to work, and I had to leave home again for work in another city!
Back at work, to be honest, her solemn oath still hadn't dispelled my doubts! I could only imagine enduring the worst possible outcome. But I became sensitive to her whereabouts, constantly checking up on her!
I knew that when things actually happened, it wouldn't be as forgiving and open-minded as I imagined! It turns out I'm incredibly jealous, terrified that someone else will actually possess my wife!
This is my mental journey regarding sexual fantasies. I wonder if any of you 69 friends have had similar experiences! What happened between her and him? Did they do it? Or not? ...Can anyone tell me?

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Between words and deeds

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